Posted 20 hours ago

If He Had Been with Me: The Tiktok Sensation

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Joined in 2023

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Nowlin focused on many dark and tough issues in this story, issues of depression, family problems and loneliness were explored in depth. I can see it—the rain-slicked road and the flashing lights of ambulance and police cars cutting through the darkness of night, warning those passing by: catastrophe has struck here, please drive slowly. At the end, when Nowlin reveals why Finny should have been with Autumn all along, readers are sure to feel the ache of life's capriciousness.

Early in her junior year of high school, Autumn realizes she is in love with Finny but accepts that he loves Sylvie.Told through Autumn’s perspective, the story takes readers through a journey of a teenager battling with internal and societal expectations. Autumn’s personality was also only shown through her relationship with her friends, which made her character drab and uninteresting. also let me just say that i really just read the first chapter in this book and was like ah ok and wiped my mind clean of it CLEARLY bc i should not be this big of a mess rn. I also knew the closer I got the end what was going to happen but I didn't know that I would be treated to confessions that made my heart burst with happiness even though I knew in a few short pages I knew my heart would break in two.

The ending takes your heart with such surprise, for 400 pages you become attached to Autumn and Finny as if you've known them forever.If He Had Been with Me is a great many things: gorgeously written, heartbreaking, harrowing, complex, and oh so much more. I can see them in the car before the accident—the heavy rain, the world and the pavement as wet and slick as if it had been oiled down for their arrival. Notes for now (for if I completely forget about this and don't make a more in depth review 🥴): I didn't like Autumn much, I didn't like her "quirky" (I hate that word so much) personality and the "Not like other girls" thing. So yeah idk if this makes me want to give the book a high or low rating but the fact that it’s evoking all these feelings out of me makes me feel like it must be doing something right.

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